piektdiena, 2010. gada 31. decembris
svētdiena, 2010. gada 26. decembris
Mīlīšīīī...!
Čaū_.
Novēlu jums sirsnīgus un smukus svētkus, kas būtu tik pat mīlīgi kā šitā dziesmiņa. ^^
Šodien man pirmo reizi pa ļoti ilgu laiku bija saruna ar vairāk kā 4 cilvēkiem paralēli, kkāds es īpašs laikam šodien uz mirklīti biju, priecē. ^^
Rīt darbs, parīt ballīte amatciemā (can't wait for the starry sky again♥, cerams būšu tādā pašā sajūsmā kā pagājšreiz), tad jaunais gads ūn kkad janvārī stokholma ūn martā anglija. mmh. pārdzīvot sesiju un es būšu laimīgs puisis ar bērneļa dvēseli (sun)
Rīt darbs, parīt ballīte amatciemā (can't wait for the starry sky again♥, cerams būšu tādā pašā sajūsmā kā pagājšreiz), tad jaunais gads ūn kkad janvārī stokholma ūn martā anglija. mmh. pārdzīvot sesiju un es būšu laimīgs puisis ar bērneļa dvēseli (sun)
♥ The fox in the background.
ceturtdiena, 2010. gada 23. decembris
trešdiena, 2010. gada 22. decembris
Just for me. Perfecto.
I laughed...
I cried...
I experienced something that changed my life...
In a nutshell, Clannad ~After Story~ influenced the way I will live for the rest of my life and not just in some half-assed way like any other show would. It legitimately moved me to make certain decisions, for better or for worse. In that sense, no other anime can compare, as no other anime has provided an equivalent reaction on my part.
*Note: I am aware that this is a repost of my old review. However, I have changed some elements of the review after further reflection and consideration of the views of others. As such, I found it more appropriate to repost the review than to merely edit it. I’m not going to lie either – part of this repost is to get more people to read the review, which is important to me because I want as many people as possible to pick up Clannad.*
Before you continue, you should know that Clannad ~After Story~ is a continuation of the story from Clannad and an adaptation from the original Visual Novel by KEY. Although knowledge of the first season is not necessary, it is highly recommended if you want to get the most out of ~After Story~ as well as this review. That being said, this review is tailored to all readers, and can be understood without knowledge of the first season. Note that there may be very minor spoilers. Now then, on to the meat and potatoes.
I won't spend much time on the individual components of Clannad ~After Story~ (or Clannad ~AS~ as I will call it now) like I have with my other reviews. At first glance, there is nothing notably outstanding about it as a whole. For those who are interested in the individual components, here they are and the reasons behind them are available at the end of the review:
Story: 8.7/10
Art/Animation: 8.4/10
Sound: 7.8/10
Character: 9.7/10
Enjoyment (in this case influence): 10+/10
Overall: 9.8/10
| Main Review |
It is difficult to convey the emotions that went through my mind as I watched Clannad ~AS~. For those of you who watched the first season and dropped the show, I urge you to pick up ~AS~ and give it a chance. The first few episodes run almost identically to those of the first season, but the true After Story part branches off in a manner that is unique only to ~AS~. What Clannad ~AS~ gives the viewer is a story of life. A story of despair. A story of forgiveness. A story of hope. Through this story, Clannad ~AS~ can powerfully change the way you perceive the world around you. I am well aware that not everyone enjoys Clannad and ~AS~, especially since the magical light orbs are outlandish to some, but for me it was a bit of a godsend among anime.
The concept of Clannad ~AS~ is neither truly unique nor breathtakingly wonderful. What the viewer gets when watching it is the story of a man. Nothing less and nothing more. What Clannad ~AS~ really excels at, however, is the way it tells the story of that man. While it may be classified as a romance or even a harem anime by some (at least the first season could be), I really classify Clannad ~AS~ as a slice of life. A slice out of the life of a delinquent who can’t seem to do anything right and struggles to protect what really matters to him as the world comes crashing down.
However, “slice of life” can be a deceptive term. As I watched Clannad ~AS~, it was not as much a slice out of Tomoya’s life but a slice out of mine. You see, what Kyoani succeeds in is hitting on the points that make life truly what it is. The continuation of time. The reality of truth. The genuine meaning of “life goes on.” Additionally, by extending over many years, the true significance of every event begins to emerge. Clannad ~AS~ takes the tale of the first season and shapes it around a single person. It is a respectable reflection of life and delves into what many shows do not, and cannot, represent: the story after the story.
While many of the situations may be overblown and excessively dramatized (at least in the opinion of some people), it is ultimately true that every facet of Clannad ~AS~ gives the audience some insight into life. Does it matter that there are miracles and magic orbs of light flying around? For me, no. For others, this could be the case. That is to say, not all aspects of Clannad ~AS~ are perfect, but the impact was enough for me.
If you are looking for a cheerful anime, turn away now. Kyoto Animation does many things with Clannad ~AS~ including some very effective humor in many places, but Clannad ~AS~ will make you cry and smile, often both in the same episode. I won’t lie, I cried at least 5 times throughout the season. Even when rewatching episodes, I cried again. Don’t get me wrong, Clannad ~AS~ really has some happy moments as well, but Kyoani tends to depress many, many times. Each sad moment is profound and beautiful, but nevertheless it is sad. The ending song, Torch, which is played in every episode, serves to alleviate this, for better or worse. Torch is very upbeat, but many people consider it unnecessary and I agree. Torch can be a real mood breaker at times.
The power that Clannad ~AS~ exerts comes from its characters. While the first season portrayed many main characters and their stories, ~AS~ focuses on the life of Tomoya and lightly on the lives of those who surround him. Tomoya is a failure in a cruel world. In a sense, he is a fatal hero. While he may not know it, he is destined to face pain and suffering through his life. There is a bit of controversy over the ending of ~AS~, but those who wish to have a “truer” ending can consider the second to last episode as such (don’t hate me for suggesting it). When seen in that light, Clannad ~AS~ effectively played out a story that neither catered to an audience nor skewed reality (except for the orbs of light, of course). What it presented was something that many people can relate to. The loss of a loved one. The pain of recovery. The neglect of a father. Rediscovering love and friendship. Coping with suffering. *SPOILER* The feeling of holding a daughter in your arms for the first time. The pains and joys of being a father. */SPOLER* What it ended with was a realistic ending and a message for the future. Additionally, if seen that way, the last episode can be portrayed as Kyoani staying true to the visual novel and respecting the source material.
*Unfortunately, more talk of the plot would undeniably lead to spoilers, which I am trying to keep free from this review, so please bear with me. Heck, if I’ve convinced you at this point, what are you waiting for? Go see for yourself what all the hype is about. Otherwise, read on!*
Ultimately, Clannad ~AS~ molded characters that I thought I was familiar with into something close to human. Their stories produced emotion that made me reconsider the situations of the people that I see every day. Through social commentary and moral struggles, the viewer can genuinely begin to respect Tomoya. I know I wouldn’t be able to withstand half of what he did, but I truly began to respect the fact that he kept going, despite him being a fictional character. Through his struggles, I began to learn about myself. Through the struggles of those around him, I began to respect those whom I had once hated. This may seem extreme, and you may think that I am crazy, but what I write is nothing but the truth. Every episode gripped me, and many episodes evoked tearful reactions, which I am not very prone to. As I continued to watch, I could hardly bear waiting a week for each new episode to come out. At the same time, however, I knew that each episode held a bomb - a flood of emotions that could affect the rest of my day. Clannad ~AS~ went way beyond enjoyment – it went into the realm of what I could call an “epiphany.”
Can the story of one man influence the lives of others? Is it still possible if that man is a fictional character? For me, I did not think it was possible for anime to extend its influence at such a level. Clannad ~AS~ proved me wrong time and time again. Look past the first season and the first few episodes, and perhaps you can begin to understand what I mean.
For those interested or who can relate after watching the show, this is the ultimate and most powerful result of the show as it applies to me. The following is the reason why I can’t keep my mind off of Clannad ~AS~ and the reason why it will remain as my #1 favorite for what I know will be many, many seasons: *SPOILER* Through Clannad ~AS~, I have basically committed to wanting to have a baby. Ushio love. */SPOILER*
| Analysis of components |
Story:
Clannad ~AS~ is unique in its storytelling, but the story itself is nothing special. The earlier episodes present almost unrelated stories just as the first season did, but Clannad ~AS~ takes a turn for the better with a focus on a single character and his ordeal. At this point, Clannad ~AS~ does nothing but follow the life of a young adult, Tomoya. Sure there is drama (oh, is there drama) and there is romance, in a sense, but in reality, there is no real plot to speak of. What there is, however, is the tale of a life experience that can change the way you live. A real deterrent might come from some of the magic that inexplicably finds its way into Clannad (both seasons), but that never really bothered me. The ending is also less-than-stellar and can be a bit confusing, but as stated before, there’s always the second to last episode to fall back on.
Art/Animation:
There is nothing blatantly wrong with the animation quality. Kyoto Animation produced Clannad ~AS~, so fans will know that there is nothing to fear. The character design is the same as that of Clannad and other KEY adaptations. The KEY character design is quite distinguishable, with its giant eyes. Personally, I am a fan, but other viewers might dislike the artwork. Other than that, Kyoani did another solid job with the animation, and there are no jerky movements that detract from the gorgeous lessons that unfold.
Sound:
Kyoani had its ups and downs with the music for Clannad ~AS~. In many aspects, Clannad ~AS~ shoots beyond other KEY adaptations with its unique, unconventional plotline and incredibly well enacted scenes of what could very well be the life of an individual. In fact, many of the ordeals that Tomoya must face strike a particularly strong emotional chord among many people. Who knows, you might not be that certain type of person, but I definitely was. Anyways… back to the music. Clannad ~AS~’s opening sequence is a strong piano melody with deceptively deep lyrics. However, the ending sequence detracts from many of the spectacular moments, especially because Kyoani tends to end episodes on a sad note. As such, many would classify Torch (the ED) as an elaborate troll because it is too lively. Beyond the OP and ED, Clannad ~AS~ features tracks from the Visual Novel, which include very familiar tracks from the first season. Notable among these are the songs with lyrics, ie Ana. Certain parts of the OST mesh very well, and a powerful soundtrack can produce a powerful reaction. However, I don’t remember anything in particular clearly standing out to me, and as previously mentioned, Torch ruined quite a few strong moments.
Character:
While most of the other aspects of Clannad ~AS~ are very similar to their counterparts in the first season, character development in ~AS~ take a turn for the better. Kyoani successfully made me hate characters that I loved and love characters that I hated. Through a roller coaster complete with dips and turns, Clannad ~AS~ changed the way I perceive all type of people. From Tomoya’s seemingly disinterested, alcoholic father to Nagisa, a character who I actually deemed annoying in the first season, I came to understand what truly makes up a person. Every character really has a story behind their dejected or cheerful façade. Despite the usual “Clannad magic,” every character also turned out to be associable, adding to the personal level of the show. Even the more comical, secondary characters had their share of emotional moments, giving them real depth and giving the viewer a relatively accurate understanding of human nature. About half-way through the show, there is a certain character that changes many, many things. I won’t spoil it now, but her unique appearance is what truly brought Clannad ~AS~ to unmatchable levels.
Enjoyment/Overall:
Enjoyment is really up to the beholder. My view of enjoyment may be somewhat different from others’. Clannad is not for everybody, but for those who dropped the first season, ~AS~ is truly on a league of its own and worth another shot. Every person has that one anime that leaps up above the rest and leaves a lasting impression. For me, that anime was Clannad ~AS~. No other words can describe the effect it had on me, and I hope that this review has at least made you, the reader, consider picking up this diamond in the rough.
| Final Thoughts |
Thank you for your time (I know the review was long), and I sincerely wish that you give Clannad ~AS~ a chance. Who knows, it may change your life. As always, comments about how effectively this review worked are welcome. Also, a helpful rating is always appreciated. show less
I cried...
I experienced something that changed my life...
In a nutshell, Clannad ~After Story~ influenced the way I will live for the rest of my life and not just in some half-assed way like any other show would. It legitimately moved me to make certain decisions, for better or for worse. In that sense, no other anime can compare, as no other anime has provided an equivalent reaction on my part.
*Note: I am aware that this is a repost of my old review. However, I have changed some elements of the review after further reflection and consideration of the views of others. As such, I found it more appropriate to repost the review than to merely edit it. I’m not going to lie either – part of this repost is to get more people to read the review, which is important to me because I want as many people as possible to pick up Clannad.*
Before you continue, you should know that Clannad ~After Story~ is a continuation of the story from Clannad and an adaptation from the original Visual Novel by KEY. Although knowledge of the first season is not necessary, it is highly recommended if you want to get the most out of ~After Story~ as well as this review. That being said, this review is tailored to all readers, and can be understood without knowledge of the first season. Note that there may be very minor spoilers. Now then, on to the meat and potatoes.
I won't spend much time on the individual components of Clannad ~After Story~ (or Clannad ~AS~ as I will call it now) like I have with my other reviews. At first glance, there is nothing notably outstanding about it as a whole. For those who are interested in the individual components, here they are and the reasons behind them are available at the end of the review:
Story: 8.7/10
Art/Animation: 8.4/10
Sound: 7.8/10
Character: 9.7/10
Enjoyment (in this case influence): 10+/10
Overall: 9.8/10
| Main Review |
It is difficult to convey the emotions that went through my mind as I watched Clannad ~AS~. For those of you who watched the first season and dropped the show, I urge you to pick up ~AS~ and give it a chance. The first few episodes run almost identically to those of the first season, but the true After Story part branches off in a manner that is unique only to ~AS~. What Clannad ~AS~ gives the viewer is a story of life. A story of despair. A story of forgiveness. A story of hope. Through this story, Clannad ~AS~ can powerfully change the way you perceive the world around you. I am well aware that not everyone enjoys Clannad and ~AS~, especially since the magical light orbs are outlandish to some, but for me it was a bit of a godsend among anime.
The concept of Clannad ~AS~ is neither truly unique nor breathtakingly wonderful. What the viewer gets when watching it is the story of a man. Nothing less and nothing more. What Clannad ~AS~ really excels at, however, is the way it tells the story of that man. While it may be classified as a romance or even a harem anime by some (at least the first season could be), I really classify Clannad ~AS~ as a slice of life. A slice out of the life of a delinquent who can’t seem to do anything right and struggles to protect what really matters to him as the world comes crashing down.
However, “slice of life” can be a deceptive term. As I watched Clannad ~AS~, it was not as much a slice out of Tomoya’s life but a slice out of mine. You see, what Kyoani succeeds in is hitting on the points that make life truly what it is. The continuation of time. The reality of truth. The genuine meaning of “life goes on.” Additionally, by extending over many years, the true significance of every event begins to emerge. Clannad ~AS~ takes the tale of the first season and shapes it around a single person. It is a respectable reflection of life and delves into what many shows do not, and cannot, represent: the story after the story.
While many of the situations may be overblown and excessively dramatized (at least in the opinion of some people), it is ultimately true that every facet of Clannad ~AS~ gives the audience some insight into life. Does it matter that there are miracles and magic orbs of light flying around? For me, no. For others, this could be the case. That is to say, not all aspects of Clannad ~AS~ are perfect, but the impact was enough for me.
If you are looking for a cheerful anime, turn away now. Kyoto Animation does many things with Clannad ~AS~ including some very effective humor in many places, but Clannad ~AS~ will make you cry and smile, often both in the same episode. I won’t lie, I cried at least 5 times throughout the season. Even when rewatching episodes, I cried again. Don’t get me wrong, Clannad ~AS~ really has some happy moments as well, but Kyoani tends to depress many, many times. Each sad moment is profound and beautiful, but nevertheless it is sad. The ending song, Torch, which is played in every episode, serves to alleviate this, for better or worse. Torch is very upbeat, but many people consider it unnecessary and I agree. Torch can be a real mood breaker at times.
The power that Clannad ~AS~ exerts comes from its characters. While the first season portrayed many main characters and their stories, ~AS~ focuses on the life of Tomoya and lightly on the lives of those who surround him. Tomoya is a failure in a cruel world. In a sense, he is a fatal hero. While he may not know it, he is destined to face pain and suffering through his life. There is a bit of controversy over the ending of ~AS~, but those who wish to have a “truer” ending can consider the second to last episode as such (don’t hate me for suggesting it). When seen in that light, Clannad ~AS~ effectively played out a story that neither catered to an audience nor skewed reality (except for the orbs of light, of course). What it presented was something that many people can relate to. The loss of a loved one. The pain of recovery. The neglect of a father. Rediscovering love and friendship. Coping with suffering. *SPOILER* The feeling of holding a daughter in your arms for the first time. The pains and joys of being a father. */SPOLER* What it ended with was a realistic ending and a message for the future. Additionally, if seen that way, the last episode can be portrayed as Kyoani staying true to the visual novel and respecting the source material.
*Unfortunately, more talk of the plot would undeniably lead to spoilers, which I am trying to keep free from this review, so please bear with me. Heck, if I’ve convinced you at this point, what are you waiting for? Go see for yourself what all the hype is about. Otherwise, read on!*
Ultimately, Clannad ~AS~ molded characters that I thought I was familiar with into something close to human. Their stories produced emotion that made me reconsider the situations of the people that I see every day. Through social commentary and moral struggles, the viewer can genuinely begin to respect Tomoya. I know I wouldn’t be able to withstand half of what he did, but I truly began to respect the fact that he kept going, despite him being a fictional character. Through his struggles, I began to learn about myself. Through the struggles of those around him, I began to respect those whom I had once hated. This may seem extreme, and you may think that I am crazy, but what I write is nothing but the truth. Every episode gripped me, and many episodes evoked tearful reactions, which I am not very prone to. As I continued to watch, I could hardly bear waiting a week for each new episode to come out. At the same time, however, I knew that each episode held a bomb - a flood of emotions that could affect the rest of my day. Clannad ~AS~ went way beyond enjoyment – it went into the realm of what I could call an “epiphany.”
Can the story of one man influence the lives of others? Is it still possible if that man is a fictional character? For me, I did not think it was possible for anime to extend its influence at such a level. Clannad ~AS~ proved me wrong time and time again. Look past the first season and the first few episodes, and perhaps you can begin to understand what I mean.
For those interested or who can relate after watching the show, this is the ultimate and most powerful result of the show as it applies to me. The following is the reason why I can’t keep my mind off of Clannad ~AS~ and the reason why it will remain as my #1 favorite for what I know will be many, many seasons: *SPOILER* Through Clannad ~AS~, I have basically committed to wanting to have a baby. Ushio love. */SPOILER*
| Analysis of components |
Story:
Clannad ~AS~ is unique in its storytelling, but the story itself is nothing special. The earlier episodes present almost unrelated stories just as the first season did, but Clannad ~AS~ takes a turn for the better with a focus on a single character and his ordeal. At this point, Clannad ~AS~ does nothing but follow the life of a young adult, Tomoya. Sure there is drama (oh, is there drama) and there is romance, in a sense, but in reality, there is no real plot to speak of. What there is, however, is the tale of a life experience that can change the way you live. A real deterrent might come from some of the magic that inexplicably finds its way into Clannad (both seasons), but that never really bothered me. The ending is also less-than-stellar and can be a bit confusing, but as stated before, there’s always the second to last episode to fall back on.
Art/Animation:
There is nothing blatantly wrong with the animation quality. Kyoto Animation produced Clannad ~AS~, so fans will know that there is nothing to fear. The character design is the same as that of Clannad and other KEY adaptations. The KEY character design is quite distinguishable, with its giant eyes. Personally, I am a fan, but other viewers might dislike the artwork. Other than that, Kyoani did another solid job with the animation, and there are no jerky movements that detract from the gorgeous lessons that unfold.
Sound:
Kyoani had its ups and downs with the music for Clannad ~AS~. In many aspects, Clannad ~AS~ shoots beyond other KEY adaptations with its unique, unconventional plotline and incredibly well enacted scenes of what could very well be the life of an individual. In fact, many of the ordeals that Tomoya must face strike a particularly strong emotional chord among many people. Who knows, you might not be that certain type of person, but I definitely was. Anyways… back to the music. Clannad ~AS~’s opening sequence is a strong piano melody with deceptively deep lyrics. However, the ending sequence detracts from many of the spectacular moments, especially because Kyoani tends to end episodes on a sad note. As such, many would classify Torch (the ED) as an elaborate troll because it is too lively. Beyond the OP and ED, Clannad ~AS~ features tracks from the Visual Novel, which include very familiar tracks from the first season. Notable among these are the songs with lyrics, ie Ana. Certain parts of the OST mesh very well, and a powerful soundtrack can produce a powerful reaction. However, I don’t remember anything in particular clearly standing out to me, and as previously mentioned, Torch ruined quite a few strong moments.
Character:
While most of the other aspects of Clannad ~AS~ are very similar to their counterparts in the first season, character development in ~AS~ take a turn for the better. Kyoani successfully made me hate characters that I loved and love characters that I hated. Through a roller coaster complete with dips and turns, Clannad ~AS~ changed the way I perceive all type of people. From Tomoya’s seemingly disinterested, alcoholic father to Nagisa, a character who I actually deemed annoying in the first season, I came to understand what truly makes up a person. Every character really has a story behind their dejected or cheerful façade. Despite the usual “Clannad magic,” every character also turned out to be associable, adding to the personal level of the show. Even the more comical, secondary characters had their share of emotional moments, giving them real depth and giving the viewer a relatively accurate understanding of human nature. About half-way through the show, there is a certain character that changes many, many things. I won’t spoil it now, but her unique appearance is what truly brought Clannad ~AS~ to unmatchable levels.
Enjoyment/Overall:
Enjoyment is really up to the beholder. My view of enjoyment may be somewhat different from others’. Clannad is not for everybody, but for those who dropped the first season, ~AS~ is truly on a league of its own and worth another shot. Every person has that one anime that leaps up above the rest and leaves a lasting impression. For me, that anime was Clannad ~AS~. No other words can describe the effect it had on me, and I hope that this review has at least made you, the reader, consider picking up this diamond in the rough.
| Final Thoughts |
Thank you for your time (I know the review was long), and I sincerely wish that you give Clannad ~AS~ a chance. Who knows, it may change your life. As always, comments about how effectively this review worked are welcome. Also, a helpful rating is always appreciated. show less
The big one. Take two.
A Dream..
I'm seeing a dream..
The same normal day again and again..Waiting for the same morning and then returning to the same dream..
Red, white, cold, warmth, sadness, and then the day starts over again.. From years ago.. I knew it from years ago.. While floating through the endless dream. While waiting for dawn that won't come..
I'm sitting at the same place. A crowd without noise, Emotionless people pass by..
Nobody notices the figure of a child sitting alone on the bench.. Waiting for someone.. Someone you know won't show up. For someone you know won't show up for years and years.. I was waiting for years. Waiting for the dawn that wouldn't come.. inside my dream.... But...
A Dream..
The day the dream ends.. Like the snow melting away under the spring sun.
Like how people's facades fade away as they age..
Like how the memories start to fade and disappear in the course of eternal time..
Now.. the long dream reaches an end.
After granting the final wish..
That one wish..
I won't say thank you,
I'll keep it to myself forever.
World of farewell will drop.
Silently after a crystal clear dream.
Holding flakes falling from the sky in both hands
I embrace them forever and ever.
She already knows the strength it takes,
To smile until the end..
otrdiena, 2010. gada 21. decembris
Okyo goes Latvian.
Locked out of Eden for failing the test
They just can't live like all of the rest
Speaking in tongues without any rhyme
Ragged outcasts on the wastelands of time
Easy rider coming down the road, easy rider overload
Looking for sometime, somewhere, some place
Sometime, somewhere, some space
Sometime, somewhere, some grace,
But nowhere is their freedom
Red flames of fire reflect in her eye
Masked by the smoke that's floating on high
Seizing the road, reaches the sky,
Like a falcon she just wants to fly
Dark clouds gather on the edge of the mist
Hear her laughter and she's gone
There's always one more mountain to climb
But we are all lost, travelers in time, a long way from home
You always fear what you don't understand
Choosing to live in Disneyland
They polish the children, they polish the grass
Definitely in a different class
All is magic on a mushroom ride
It's so tragic when you realize
They just can't live like all of the rest
Speaking in tongues without any rhyme
Ragged outcasts on the wastelands of time
Easy rider coming down the road, easy rider overload
Looking for sometime, somewhere, some place
Sometime, somewhere, some space
Sometime, somewhere, some grace,
But nowhere is their freedom
Red flames of fire reflect in her eye
Masked by the smoke that's floating on high
Seizing the road, reaches the sky,
Like a falcon she just wants to fly
Dark clouds gather on the edge of the mist
Hear her laughter and she's gone
There's always one more mountain to climb
But we are all lost, travelers in time, a long way from home
You always fear what you don't understand
Choosing to live in Disneyland
They polish the children, they polish the grass
Definitely in a different class
All is magic on a mushroom ride
It's so tragic when you realize
svētdiena, 2010. gada 19. decembris
True story!
i have to say, i was completely devastated by the last five episodes of After Story. midway through the last one, i thought i would be dehydrated.
i've watched this show three times and the feelings it gives to me never get old.
seriously, a person that doesn't shed a tear for this got nothing beating in his/her chest.
even though i don't think anything will ever come close to it (and i hope i'm wrong), i don't even argue about people's opinions on the whole series, but how one can be that heartless is just beyond me. it's impossible to remain oblivious to the heartbreaking/heartwarming moments.
i hope key and kyoani keep turning to gold everything they touch.
so true, nevarētu pateikt labāk myself (sun)
i've watched this show three times and the feelings it gives to me never get old.
seriously, a person that doesn't shed a tear for this got nothing beating in his/her chest.
even though i don't think anything will ever come close to it (and i hope i'm wrong), i don't even argue about people's opinions on the whole series, but how one can be that heartless is just beyond me. it's impossible to remain oblivious to the heartbreaking/heartwarming moments.
i hope key and kyoani keep turning to gold everything they touch.
so true, nevarētu pateikt labāk myself (sun)
Kimi kawaiiiiiii :3
Saigo no koi, ni shiyou tte chikata koto,
Ima wa mada naisho ni shiteokou ka
Hitori de niyaketeru gozen reiji sugi,
Aishiteru anata no koto
Hajimete no kimochi yo,
Aishiteru zutto zutto,
Kawaranai kimochi
We promised that we would be in love forever,
Maybe I'll keep it as my own secret for now,
Laying there past midnight, grinning to myself,
I love you,
I've never felt like this before,
I love you forever and ever,
My feelings will never change.
Ima wa mada naisho ni shiteokou ka
Hitori de niyaketeru gozen reiji sugi,
Aishiteru anata no koto
Hajimete no kimochi yo,
Aishiteru zutto zutto,
Kawaranai kimochi
We promised that we would be in love forever,
Maybe I'll keep it as my own secret for now,
Laying there past midnight, grinning to myself,
I love you,
I've never felt like this before,
I love you forever and ever,
My feelings will never change.
sestdiena, 2010. gada 18. decembris
piektdiena, 2010. gada 17. decembris
zsvētku balle.
psc..
Balle pati iesūkāja, un... bļ... es nekaaaaaaaaad neesmu vēl bijis tādā kõmā..
kamõn, pat policija redzēja kā es korķējos pie olimpijas. :(
džīzas.. :(
I feel bad right now =/
Balle pati iesūkāja, un... bļ... es nekaaaaaaaaad neesmu vēl bijis tādā kõmā..
kamõn, pat policija redzēja kā es korķējos pie olimpijas. :(
džīzas.. :(
I feel bad right now =/
trešdiena, 2010. gada 15. decembris
iiii.!
Šodienas funny moment.
Skype saruna:
Mamma: "kam kājas pieder?"
Es: "?"
Mamma: "fočenē"
Es : "manas o_o"
Mamma: ":O"
Es, apjēdzot, ka man vairs nav šī fočene.--->
Bet gan šī ->
Es: "uj! cita bilde! nē! tās nav manas! nezinu kam! :D"
Mamma: "ehh, es jau sacerējos, ka ES tādas radīju.."
.. D:..
Pēc veiksmīgas darba intervijas and iekļūšanas avārijā and ieskaišu iegūšanas universitātē and pirms sesijas and pirms rītdienas zsvētku balles I got only one thing to say
...
...
...
Voice of an angel.
Skype saruna:
Mamma: "kam kājas pieder?"
Es: "?"
Mamma: "fočenē"
Es : "manas o_o"
Mamma: ":O"
Es, apjēdzot, ka man vairs nav šī fočene.--->
Bet gan šī ->
Es: "uj! cita bilde! nē! tās nav manas! nezinu kam! :D"
Mamma: "ehh, es jau sacerējos, ka ES tādas radīju.."
.. D:..
Pēc veiksmīgas darba intervijas and iekļūšanas avārijā and ieskaišu iegūšanas universitātē and pirms sesijas and pirms rītdienas zsvētku balles I got only one thing to say
...
...
...
Voice of an angel.
Rrrr... (:
Baby, don't cry now. you ask me just like always
That time we found a pure white memory, the commotion
Baby, hold me now, i'm trembling.
So we don't break this memory, more shy than yesterday
The rain has lifted, only the path
With light drying it, swaying quietly remains
How many times have our kisses piled up, as fragile as glass
A love that can't sleep has no where to go, lost in heaven
In a straight line we go into the evening
Make a shadow, stretching out, crying a little
If this warm miracle blows through my chest
The flow of time and flow of water will stop
The person i love will have a trembling memory
And keep going forever into a dream
Let's make a promise, never to forget it
Baby, classic blue tears are overflowing
If this warm miracle blows through my chest
Just like this here, gently the two of us
To my lover the trembling memory is still alive
If the wind still blows strong in this town
It will beautifully paint those painful days the color of sky
The person i love will have a trembling thought
And keep going forever into a dream
That time we found a pure white memory, the commotion
Baby, hold me now, i'm trembling.
So we don't break this memory, more shy than yesterday
The rain has lifted, only the path
With light drying it, swaying quietly remains
How many times have our kisses piled up, as fragile as glass
A love that can't sleep has no where to go, lost in heaven
In a straight line we go into the evening
Make a shadow, stretching out, crying a little
If this warm miracle blows through my chest
The flow of time and flow of water will stop
The person i love will have a trembling memory
And keep going forever into a dream
Let's make a promise, never to forget it
Baby, classic blue tears are overflowing
If this warm miracle blows through my chest
Just like this here, gently the two of us
To my lover the trembling memory is still alive
If the wind still blows strong in this town
It will beautifully paint those painful days the color of sky
The person i love will have a trembling thought
And keep going forever into a dream
pirmdiena, 2010. gada 13. decembris
Cuz when a ♥ breaks, no, it don't break even.
A sad shadow of lovers,
On a road after the last train,
Already nobody else there..
It was a summer night,
When we promised ourselves in our hearts,
We'll never see each other, forever,
Never see forever..
We smiled at each other,
Only because we were side by side,
I believed such a day lasted forever.
We should be a dark night itself,
If I were to not love you.
Your last kiss,
Stung when it touched..
Before my heart overflows..
With a love overdose that hurts you.
Hug me tight,
With your arms,
Only one more second,
With you I want to be.
It would be impossible
To quarrel,
To be jealous,
And even to see your looks forever.
I wonder why they utter a promise instantly,
Which wouldn't be kept.
Although they know there is nothing anywhere,
To tie their hearts together firmly.
Your last words,
They stung,
Because they were too tender for me,
Maybe we've known each other too much.
I want to hug your face in my bosom,
And stroke your child-like hair,
It would be impossible
To laugh by your side,
To sleep by your side,
And even to call your name forever,
It isn't a promise that ties our hearts,
Only to console ourselves,
We make a promise, don't we?
Hug me tight!
With your arms!
Only one more second,
With you I want to be.
If it is impossible
To quarrel,
To be jealous,
And even to see your looks forever.
Even if I want to see you,
Even If I can't breathe,
I promise not to call your name,
I promise not to call your name..
_____________________________
Mou nido to, mou nido to awanai to,
kokoro ni chikaiatta natsu no yoru
_____________________________
Skan.. jau pailgu laiciņu..
svētdiena, 2010. gada 12. decembris
#390 Suki yooo itsumademooo :3
:3
________________
Yes, even though everyone noticed it,
But they pretended like they didn't.
I wished everything would've just ended.
In a heavy rain.
You silently reached out your hand,
Without saying a word,
You showed me what bravery is.
We are running straight ahead, breathlessly,
To an endlessly distant future.
It feels like we have been living for so long,
But we still haven't reached it yet.
Hey, even if my heart is filled full of pain,
I wish that I could still recognize beauty as it is.
You are not anyone else, just be who you are,
Hold the memories tightly, with both of your hands,
The world spreads out before your eyes,
Not a single thing happens without meaning.
We will remember the days,
How and when we got through life,
..Someday I believe.
Open your heart. Life sings.
We are running straight ahead, breathlessly,
To an endlessly distant future.
It feels like we have been living for so long,
But we still haven't reached it yet.
The bright shiny morning is waiting for us
I believe.
sestdiena, 2010. gada 11. decembris
"How much is too much?"
Sāku skatīties seriālu Modern Family, It's just so awesome. ^____^
Pēdējā nedēļa skolā. Es tik ļoti ceru, ka es visu paspēšu nokārtot.. rīt būs traka mācību diena, jo šodien vajadzētu, bet es tomēr nemācīšos.
Es esmu lupata. :(
:D.
P.S. I lost 90% of my hair yesterday :(
P.S.S. My hair smells AWESOME (sun)
Pēdējā nedēļa skolā. Es tik ļoti ceru, ka es visu paspēšu nokārtot.. rīt būs traka mācību diena, jo šodien vajadzētu, bet es tomēr nemācīšos.
Es esmu lupata. :(
:D.
P.S. I lost 90% of my hair yesterday :(
P.S.S. My hair smells AWESOME (sun)
trešdiena, 2010. gada 8. decembris
pirmdiena, 2010. gada 6. decembris
Easy Peasy.
All it took was -
Izgriezt to no video,
noņemt nost video, atstājot tikai dziesmu,
padarīt par mp3,
Padarīt atkal par video, jo youtube nepieņem .mp3
Upload to youtube!
And now it's here! yay!
<3 this song.
P.S. Fuck you if you don't like the pictures, me likes them. ._.
in case youtube is fucking up like it is for me now and embedding doesn't work :x
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Kf1vQl6gSs
Izgriezt to no video,
noņemt nost video, atstājot tikai dziesmu,
padarīt par mp3,
Padarīt atkal par video, jo youtube nepieņem .mp3
Upload to youtube!
And now it's here! yay!
<3 this song.
P.S. Fuck you if you don't like the pictures, me likes them. ._.
in case youtube is fucking up like it is for me now and embedding doesn't work :x
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Kf1vQl6gSs
svētdiena, 2010. gada 5. decembris
Nevaru dabūt šurp grrr.
Welcome,we love you,
We hate you,
We love you,
We want you,
We need you,
We wish we were like you,
They say you're a saint,
You're a whore,
You're a sinner,
That he had you,
Made you,
Can't live without you,
Would you confess if we asked,
That you nurture,
The urge to declare,
That it's time,
To settle down with a man of your own,
You want,
A baby,
A family,
A piece of security.
We hate you,
We love you,
We want you,
We need you,
We wish we were like you,
They say you're a saint,
You're a whore,
You're a sinner,
That he had you,
Made you,
Can't live without you,
Would you confess if we asked,
That you nurture,
The urge to declare,
That it's time,
To settle down with a man of your own,
You want,
A baby,
A family,
A piece of security.
piektdiena, 2010. gada 3. decembris
wtf.
Mums drīz mājās būs kaķis.
________________________
best Fan-made content ever. :D
[even tho it's a bit queer]
________________________
best Fan-made content ever. :D
[even tho it's a bit queer]
pirmdiena, 2010. gada 29. novembris
Pāvel!
Whatcha doin retardo!
Cita nots.. Šonakt daudz sapņi. Dīvaini sapņi. I mean c'mon.. "Es eju ar kājām no siguldas līdz rīgai, un nu jā, zvanu tev.". Tad vēl braukšana ar riteni pa ūdenskritumiem. Būšana pie artas ciemos ventspilī. Ūn vel dažas "fucking why" lietas.. nja.. fucking why lol.
Next.. Šodienas rīts sākās drausmīgi :/
"Pāvel, kur tu esi, Buiķis grib ar tevīm runāt par kkādu KD!"
Ko es faking darīšu ar to matemātiku, tikai 2 nedēļas palikušas..
I pull myself to pieces, I don't think I'll make it back,
Follow thorugh excuses for mistakes made in the past.
Cita nots.. Šonakt daudz sapņi. Dīvaini sapņi. I mean c'mon.. "Es eju ar kājām no siguldas līdz rīgai, un nu jā, zvanu tev.". Tad vēl braukšana ar riteni pa ūdenskritumiem. Būšana pie artas ciemos ventspilī. Ūn vel dažas "fucking why" lietas.. nja.. fucking why lol.
Next.. Šodienas rīts sākās drausmīgi :/
"Pāvel, kur tu esi, Buiķis grib ar tevīm runāt par kkādu KD!"
Ko es faking darīšu ar to matemātiku, tikai 2 nedēļas palikušas..
I pull myself to pieces, I don't think I'll make it back,
Follow thorugh excuses for mistakes made in the past.
svētdiena, 2010. gada 28. novembris
Fāk. :D
Sāsõdīts :D :D
Mani stipru tik ilgi turēja tik viena doma. Viena nostāja. Ūn nu fak nu. :D
Tikko ieraudzīju pāris lietas, kas to visu pilnība sagrāva.
FML. :D
Anyway, ar angļiem ir faking grūti runāt pa telefonu, jo holy shit, they just can't shut up. O_O
And they talk faking fast. And man vakar bija skumīga domiņa galvā, par to vienu lietu, kuras man šobrīd dzīvē pietrūkst, but I'm pretty much fine without that thing, ūn tas mani nedaudz biedē. Esmu citādāks. (:
Atceros pirms vairāk kā gada man bija arī viena domiņa, kuru MAN ŠĶIET, ka es pierakstīju blogā, bet neemsu pārliecināts. Doma bija "Sometimes, all you can do, is make sure that you'll remain a good memory."
I wonder how it is, gribētos jau ticēt, ka ir ir good memory, bet nu tika radītas šaubas tajā ziņā. Žēl. negribētos lai būtu slikti, kā nekā special stuff is special for a reason.
My dear friend, please don't forget about me. (:
Mani stipru tik ilgi turēja tik viena doma. Viena nostāja. Ūn nu fak nu. :D
Tikko ieraudzīju pāris lietas, kas to visu pilnība sagrāva.
FML. :D
Anyway, ar angļiem ir faking grūti runāt pa telefonu, jo holy shit, they just can't shut up. O_O
And they talk faking fast. And man vakar bija skumīga domiņa galvā, par to vienu lietu, kuras man šobrīd dzīvē pietrūkst, but I'm pretty much fine without that thing, ūn tas mani nedaudz biedē. Esmu citādāks. (:
Atceros pirms vairāk kā gada man bija arī viena domiņa, kuru MAN ŠĶIET, ka es pierakstīju blogā, bet neemsu pārliecināts. Doma bija "Sometimes, all you can do, is make sure that you'll remain a good memory."
I wonder how it is, gribētos jau ticēt, ka ir ir good memory, bet nu tika radītas šaubas tajā ziņā. Žēl. negribētos lai būtu slikti, kā nekā special stuff is special for a reason.
My dear friend, please don't forget about me. (:
piektdiena, 2010. gada 26. novembris
Dejavoux of extended amnesia.
And after it ends.
We'll try to be friends.
And after it doesn't work.
We'll try not to blame.
You can't keep shuffling the deck and hoping if...
If it's just not in the cards.
We'll try to be friends.
And after it doesn't work.
We'll try not to blame.
You can't keep shuffling the deck and hoping if...
If it's just not in the cards.
trešdiena, 2010. gada 24. novembris
FT#55
Interesting.. :o
Num ko. Darbiņš ko tik ilgi gaidīju 5dien būs jāsāk.
Diemžēl nav ko vairs teikt, so I'll just put this here. (Brālis Pālis.)
Num ko. Darbiņš ko tik ilgi gaidīju 5dien būs jāsāk.
Diemžēl nav ko vairs teikt, so I'll just put this here. (Brālis Pālis.)
pirmdiena, 2010. gada 22. novembris
Metafora, kas šodien ienāca prātiņā.
It's like you're in a bar, drinking beers with the girl of your dreams, and then she stands up on the table and yells out "Who wants a blowjob!?!?".
sestdiena, 2010. gada 20. novembris
18. novembris.
Mammai dzimšanas diena.
Annijai dzimšanas diena.
Latvijai svētki.
Kicim 19. nov. dz.d. bet svinam 18ajā.
18ais bija super. Kici faking dzērāj, kāpēc tu šoreiz tā piepisies, nu.. :D
19ais bija drausmīgs. I wanted to cut my own head off, tāda paģira, užasiņš :(
Bet nu anyway, beidzot es jūtos labi. (:
Atstāšu tev, bloguci, šito te videõ, kas ir foršākā lieta ko es esmu redzējis ļoti ilgā laika posmā.
I think I need you.
Annijai dzimšanas diena.
Latvijai svētki.
Kicim 19. nov. dz.d. bet svinam 18ajā.
18ais bija super. Kici faking dzērāj, kāpēc tu šoreiz tā piepisies, nu.. :D
19ais bija drausmīgs. I wanted to cut my own head off, tāda paģira, užasiņš :(
Bet nu anyway, beidzot es jūtos labi. (:
Atstāšu tev, bloguci, šito te videõ, kas ir foršākā lieta ko es esmu redzējis ļoti ilgā laika posmā.
I think I need you.
trešdiena, 2010. gada 10. novembris
Čiv.
Jā.. es, muļķis, tagad dažreiz tā sveicinos... :D
Pēdējās 30 min galvā visu laiku ir tikai viena lieta. Positivus.
Sasodīts kā es gribu atkal pēdējās dienas nakti, ar kompāniju, šmidzīti, ūn "LAURAAAAAAAAAAAA" un aldi komā..
I wanna go to england again. Can't wait for march, cerams, ka tiešām tur aizdosimies, un nebūs tā, ka mēs tik novembrī par to runājām, bet šoreiz tā arī ne uz vienu citu valstiņu neaizdosimies.
Šodien teicu Zanei, ka vajag iesvetīt viņas dzīvokli ūn viņa man teica lai es 4dien braucu, bēt lai braucu viens. Pat kad prasīju par Kici un Nadju dabūju ļoti jocīgu "nu.. jā.. viņi var." That totally didn't sound like the zaņasaikõ we all know and love.
Nu ja, rezultātā gan protams būs tā ka rīīīīt brauksim ar nauri ūn varbūt kici un nadju, ūn norausim gan viņai gan dzīvoklim jumtu, bēt nū ^_____^
Jauna tēma matemātikā.. es esmu šokā jo es visu saprotu.
Vakar.. vai arī aizvakar.. neatceros.. I did a thing.
I thought I'd be glad. I'm not. Laikam tādēļ, ka es to darīju, jo vajadzēja nevis gribējās. Bēt man vienalga, es smaidu. ^__^
Es gribu kaut ko jaunu. Būs jāuztaisa rituāliņš. Jā. Tieši tā. Rīt no rīta, es nomainīšu apaviem šņores, kuras man reku stāv jau sen, bet es tā arī neesmu tās vēl ievilcis nereizi.
Ā vēl.. biju atlētikā, some cool butts there, and they're shaking and wobbling and stuff, ūn jā, šito visu tikko pateica vīrišķa aprobežotais prātiņš. (sun)
Now that all this is out of me and in here.. Mieriņš. ^_^
Pēdējās 30 min galvā visu laiku ir tikai viena lieta. Positivus.
Sasodīts kā es gribu atkal pēdējās dienas nakti, ar kompāniju, šmidzīti, ūn "LAURAAAAAAAAAAAA" un aldi komā..
I wanna go to england again. Can't wait for march, cerams, ka tiešām tur aizdosimies, un nebūs tā, ka mēs tik novembrī par to runājām, bet šoreiz tā arī ne uz vienu citu valstiņu neaizdosimies.
Šodien teicu Zanei, ka vajag iesvetīt viņas dzīvokli ūn viņa man teica lai es 4dien braucu, bēt lai braucu viens. Pat kad prasīju par Kici un Nadju dabūju ļoti jocīgu "nu.. jā.. viņi var." That totally didn't sound like the zaņasaikõ we all know and love.
Nu ja, rezultātā gan protams būs tā ka rīīīīt brauksim ar nauri ūn varbūt kici un nadju, ūn norausim gan viņai gan dzīvoklim jumtu, bēt nū ^_____^
Jauna tēma matemātikā.. es esmu šokā jo es visu saprotu.
Vakar.. vai arī aizvakar.. neatceros.. I did a thing.
I thought I'd be glad. I'm not. Laikam tādēļ, ka es to darīju, jo vajadzēja nevis gribējās. Bēt man vienalga, es smaidu. ^__^
Es gribu kaut ko jaunu. Būs jāuztaisa rituāliņš. Jā. Tieši tā. Rīt no rīta, es nomainīšu apaviem šņores, kuras man reku stāv jau sen, bet es tā arī neesmu tās vēl ievilcis nereizi.
Ā vēl.. biju atlētikā, some cool butts there, and they're shaking and wobbling and stuff, ūn jā, šito visu tikko pateica vīrišķa aprobežotais prātiņš. (sun)
Now that all this is out of me and in here.. Mieriņš. ^_^
sestdiena, 2010. gada 6. novembris
Hey, love. That's the name we've long held back from the core of truth.
6 tabletes.
fucking daudz.. ūn cilvēki kas mani pazīst zin, ka es NEVARU CIEST zāles.
Dzeru ļooooti vāju tēju ar 5 cukura kubiņiem ūn tas viss kopā garšo pēc kkādas ogu dziras.. funny jo tēja ir melnā + piparmētru...
Jā es te rakstu vienkārši randomā faktus tagad..
Kaut kā šodien ģimene pret manīm dīvaini izturējās.. I think I might've done something, but I don't know what.
Šodien sākās mans gada abonements.. Rīt pirmo dienu došos, joprojām ceru uz konceptu, ja nebūs tad vismaz vienu reizi aizdošos uz juglas filiāli, kas ir sasodīti tālu salīdzinot ar zolitūdi :/
Drīzumā, cerams, dosimies prāmī paballēties. Gribu. Rīkojam pamazām.
26. novembrī uz cacophonics.
12. novembrī arī maybe arī uz grupu, kuras nosaukumu neatceros, bet sākās uz I.. [everyone knows that one lol.]
Gribu pokera vakaru.
Visu laiku reibst galva.. es gribu justies sasodīti vesels, kā pirms 3-4 gadiem >_<.
fucking daudz.. ūn cilvēki kas mani pazīst zin, ka es NEVARU CIEST zāles.
Dzeru ļooooti vāju tēju ar 5 cukura kubiņiem ūn tas viss kopā garšo pēc kkādas ogu dziras.. funny jo tēja ir melnā + piparmētru...
Jā es te rakstu vienkārši randomā faktus tagad..
Kaut kā šodien ģimene pret manīm dīvaini izturējās.. I think I might've done something, but I don't know what.
Šodien sākās mans gada abonements.. Rīt pirmo dienu došos, joprojām ceru uz konceptu, ja nebūs tad vismaz vienu reizi aizdošos uz juglas filiāli, kas ir sasodīti tālu salīdzinot ar zolitūdi :/
Drīzumā, cerams, dosimies prāmī paballēties. Gribu. Rīkojam pamazām.
26. novembrī uz cacophonics.
12. novembrī arī maybe arī uz grupu, kuras nosaukumu neatceros, bet sākās uz I.. [everyone knows that one lol.]
Gribu pokera vakaru.
Visu laiku reibst galva.. es gribu justies sasodīti vesels, kā pirms 3-4 gadiem >_<.
pirmdiena, 2010. gada 1. novembris
"Interesanti... tu arī drebi."
Num ko.. beidzot esmu mājās, lai šito te ierakstīt..
Here goes.
Atceros kā man vienreiz kāds teica, ka es pārāk maz daru un pārāk daudz domāju.
Vienu dienu I decided, ka ta tas varētu būt, un nodomāju kādu dienu pamēģināt to pamainīt.
Nesen..
Piektdien in fact.
Teikšu tieši - bija iedzerts, bet nu es visu kontrolēju un nekādu traucējumu itkā nebija. Kopumā par šo mēģinājumu teikšu tā. I'll never do it again.
Jo...
Pirmo reizi dzīvē es patiešām nožēloju, ko es sadarīju piektdienā.
Moreover.. es atminējos KĀPĒC es vispār domāju daudz pirms darīšanas and that's because I was like this before. A long time ago. And I changed. And I'm sure as fuck not going back there. So bite me all the people who think I don't do enough. It has nothing to do with you anyway. Varat man teikt, ka es tēloju nevainīgo radījumu cik vien jums tīk, es vienmēr atbildēšu "You are an idiot. Un jā, es to daru, un turpināsu to darīt." Un vispār, es tagad esmu dusmīgs. Galvenokārt uz sevīm. Ūn studentu klub, es gribu atpakaļ savu džemperi.
Here goes.
Atceros kā man vienreiz kāds teica, ka es pārāk maz daru un pārāk daudz domāju.
Vienu dienu I decided, ka ta tas varētu būt, un nodomāju kādu dienu pamēģināt to pamainīt.
Nesen..
Piektdien in fact.
Teikšu tieši - bija iedzerts, bet nu es visu kontrolēju un nekādu traucējumu itkā nebija. Kopumā par šo mēģinājumu teikšu tā. I'll never do it again.
Jo...
Pirmo reizi dzīvē es patiešām nožēloju, ko es sadarīju piektdienā.
Moreover.. es atminējos KĀPĒC es vispār domāju daudz pirms darīšanas and that's because I was like this before. A long time ago. And I changed. And I'm sure as fuck not going back there. So bite me all the people who think I don't do enough. It has nothing to do with you anyway. Varat man teikt, ka es tēloju nevainīgo radījumu cik vien jums tīk, es vienmēr atbildēšu "You are an idiot. Un jā, es to daru, un turpināsu to darīt." Un vispār, es tagad esmu dusmīgs. Galvenokārt uz sevīm. Ūn studentu klub, es gribu atpakaļ savu džemperi.
piektdiena, 2010. gada 29. oktobris
Šodienas smiekliņš.
"Nu karoč, es arī būšu ap 2iem.."
"Ā, okēy. super."
"Eu paklau, a tev kaut ko no mana pagraba nevajag? t.b. kaut kādi marinēti gurķi vai āboli..?"
"Nice one, friend.:D bēt nu marinētos gurķus vari paķert priekš.. nu.. tu zini priekš kam."
Love the way she laughs (sun)
"Ā, okēy. super."
"Eu paklau, a tev kaut ko no mana pagraba nevajag? t.b. kaut kādi marinēti gurķi vai āboli..?"
"Nice one, friend.:D bēt nu marinētos gurķus vari paķert priekš.. nu.. tu zini priekš kam."
Love the way she laughs (sun)
otrdiena, 2010. gada 26. oktobris
Besī. Sasodīti smuki.
Lieku šo te iekšā tīri priekš sevis, jo zinu ka neviens no jums šitos nespēs novērtēt, but I don't care. Happy place.
Pats sākums and 2:00 till 2:37 and 3:15 till the end.. khh..!
Saldu miegu.
Awesome job.
18,000 views. 160 comments. Good ratio. Guess why. Awesomesauce.
Pats sākums and 2:00 till 2:37 and 3:15 till the end.. khh..!
Saldu miegu.
Awesome job.
18,000 views. 160 comments. Good ratio. Guess why. Awesomesauce.
pirmdiena, 2010. gada 25. oktobris
It's a beautiful dream.
If the sky opened up for me,
And the mountains disappeared,
If the seas ran dry, turned to dust
And the sun refused to rise
I would still find my way,
By the light I see in your eyes.
The world I know fades away
But you stay.
As the earth reclaims its due,
And the cycle starts anew,
We'll stay, always
In the love that we have
Shared before time.
If the years take away
Every memory that I have
I would still know the way
That would lead me back to your side.
The North star may die
But the light that I see in your eyes
Will burn there always
Lit by the love we have
Shared before time.
When the forest turns to jade
And the stories that we've made.
Dissolve away
One shining light will still remain.
When we shed our earthly skin,
And when our real life begins,
There'll be no shame
Just the love that we have made before time.
And the mountains disappeared,
If the seas ran dry, turned to dust
And the sun refused to rise
I would still find my way,
By the light I see in your eyes.
The world I know fades away
But you stay.
As the earth reclaims its due,
And the cycle starts anew,
We'll stay, always
In the love that we have
Shared before time.
If the years take away
Every memory that I have
I would still know the way
That would lead me back to your side.
The North star may die
But the light that I see in your eyes
Will burn there always
Lit by the love we have
Shared before time.
When the forest turns to jade
And the stories that we've made.
Dissolve away
One shining light will still remain.
When we shed our earthly skin,
And when our real life begins,
There'll be no shame
Just the love that we have made before time.
Filled with tears like never before.
Es tik ļoti varu sevi iedomāties šito klausoties ziemassvētkos..
I've strayed from the path I saw ahead of me.
I need more changes. Quick.
I've strayed from the path I saw ahead of me.
I need more changes. Quick.
sestdiena, 2010. gada 23. oktobris
Born to be riled.
Bet..
Man pilnīgi, galīgi, totāli un absolūti nav, ko teikt.
...
...
Es nopirku austiņas un man beidzās e-talons.
Is that enough...?
Dievinu klavieres šitajā gabalā.
Dīvaina sajūta kad neredz cauri, ne?
Man pilnīgi, galīgi, totāli un absolūti nav, ko teikt.
...
...
Es nopirku austiņas un man beidzās e-talons.
Is that enough...?
Dievinu klavieres šitajā gabalā.
Dīvaina sajūta kad neredz cauri, ne?
otrdiena, 2010. gada 19. oktobris
pirmdiena, 2010. gada 18. oktobris
#367.
You're my hero,
Šobrīd diēēvinūū oranžo, dzelteno, zilzaļo and zilgano krāsu. mm.
Tik ļoti in fact ka man tagad sagribējās fotošopā izpausties sõ..
5 min darbiņš -
Jēēj, õsom kolõrz ^___^
Ūn fāk mani besī kā fotošopā vienmēr viss izskatās 10x labāk. :D
ĀNYWĀI, jādodas tīties kamoliņā.
Night night ^________^
Šobrīd diēēvinūū oranžo, dzelteno, zilzaļo and zilgano krāsu. mm.
Tik ļoti in fact ka man tagad sagribējās fotošopā izpausties sõ..
5 min darbiņš -
Jēēj, õsom kolõrz ^___^
Ūn fāk mani besī kā fotošopā vienmēr viss izskatās 10x labāk. :D
ĀNYWĀI, jādodas tīties kamoliņā.
Night night ^________^
svētdiena, 2010. gada 17. oktobris
#366.
Fucking daudz mācīties vajag :(
...
...
Jē loģistikas KD 81 punkti no 100.
...
...
Jē matemātikā 3.
...
...
Rīt KD muitās..
...
...
...
Trešdien dabūšu gada abonementu uz "Atletika". Jāmainās.
...
...
...
...
Visdrīzākceturtdien jāsatiek exbumbul, and gotta get this over with.
...
...
...
...
Piektdien uz ventspili, yay.
...
...
...
Nice me, wanna fuck my shoes?
...
...
Jē loģistikas KD 81 punkti no 100.
...
...
Jē matemātikā 3.
...
...
Rīt KD muitās..
...
...
...
Trešdien dabūšu gada abonementu uz "Atletika". Jāmainās.
...
...
...
...
Visdrīzākceturtdien jāsatiek exbumbul, and gotta get this over with.
...
...
...
...
Piektdien uz ventspili, yay.
...
...
...
Nice me, wanna fuck my shoes?
ceturtdiena, 2010. gada 14. oktobris
Nyuu in my head again (sun)
It was the beginning of a summer that was as short as a star's twinkle... and as long as an eternity...
trešdiena, 2010. gada 13. oktobris
Pēdējās pāris dienas.
Laikam emocionālā ziņā grūtākās ... nē.. vienas no grūtākajām manā dzīvē.
tik daudz kas dažāds noticis.. visu gan te rakstīt es nerakstīšu, dažādu apsvērumu dēļ, bet num, biku jau var.
Nesen bija tādas domas galvā "how do I feel with her? happy? alrighty then."
Mēneša laikā satiku visas savas bijušās draudzenes [kas ir vienkārši "WHAT?", jo kamõn. tāda sakritība ka psc.] Vienu pat manā autobusā. MANĀ autobusā. >_< Brālis aizvakar pateica ka drīzumā izvāksies no mājas.. Man pietrūks smirdīgās[holy shit] hokejformas vannas istabā.. Oh well.. 4dien bija forša nakts, psycho things happened. Pirmdien, somebody mani rimčikā nedaudz apgaismoja ūn padeva dažus mājienus.. tuvākais laika periods būs interesants. Izskatās ka kontakts ar dažiem labiem bijušajiem rkģ'niekiem ir zudis uz pavisam, ūn nu labi, ja nav vēlme tikties tad nav, ko darīsi. Pirmdien universitātē smējāmies līdz asarām seminārā. "Kā tas atrisinās pensionāru uzturēšanas problēmu..?"
"Nu kā.. mazāk pensionāru, vieglāk uzturēt."
What else..
Visu laiku klausos Motion City Soundtrack, viņiem ir daudz foršas dziesmas.
Šodien bija almost-fail, kad izdzēsu datormācībā mūsu grupiņas 4 nedēļu darbu, labi ka bija backup. :D
My mind's still a mess overall.
Pirms pāris min. ielīdu svešā teritorijā ūn guvu sev nelielu sirdsmieru. Pārliecinājos. Šoreiz ir. Heart's not broken anymore.
ūn by the way.. MAN IR KARIJA MĒRCE. ^________^
UN ŠŅABIS.
Un vispār man ir faking rozā krekls, kurš nesen vēl bija balts =(
Bite me (h)
tik daudz kas dažāds noticis.. visu gan te rakstīt es nerakstīšu, dažādu apsvērumu dēļ, bet num, biku jau var.
Nesen bija tādas domas galvā "how do I feel with her? happy? alrighty then."
Mēneša laikā satiku visas savas bijušās draudzenes [kas ir vienkārši "WHAT?", jo kamõn. tāda sakritība ka psc.] Vienu pat manā autobusā. MANĀ autobusā. >_< Brālis aizvakar pateica ka drīzumā izvāksies no mājas.. Man pietrūks smirdīgās[holy shit] hokejformas vannas istabā.. Oh well.. 4dien bija forša nakts, psycho things happened. Pirmdien, somebody mani rimčikā nedaudz apgaismoja ūn padeva dažus mājienus.. tuvākais laika periods būs interesants. Izskatās ka kontakts ar dažiem labiem bijušajiem rkģ'niekiem ir zudis uz pavisam, ūn nu labi, ja nav vēlme tikties tad nav, ko darīsi. Pirmdien universitātē smējāmies līdz asarām seminārā. "Kā tas atrisinās pensionāru uzturēšanas problēmu..?"
"Nu kā.. mazāk pensionāru, vieglāk uzturēt."
What else..
Visu laiku klausos Motion City Soundtrack, viņiem ir daudz foršas dziesmas.
Šodien bija almost-fail, kad izdzēsu datormācībā mūsu grupiņas 4 nedēļu darbu, labi ka bija backup. :D
My mind's still a mess overall.
Pirms pāris min. ielīdu svešā teritorijā ūn guvu sev nelielu sirdsmieru. Pārliecinājos. Šoreiz ir. Heart's not broken anymore.
ūn by the way.. MAN IR KARIJA MĒRCE. ^________^
UN ŠŅABIS.
Un vispār man ir faking rozā krekls, kurš nesen vēl bija balts =(
Bite me (h)
svētdiena, 2010. gada 10. oktobris
laf
I can't explain...
I need to be alone.
I know the timing isn't great
But these things, you just can't plan.
I just need a little time
So I can find myself again
'Cause I get buried underneath
All the things they think you are
And I'm too tired to pretend it doesn't hurt
To be left out
I had a pocket full of dreams
But I gave them all to you
Now I think I want them back
So can you tell me if I'm crazy or confused?
Don't ever change
The way you are
I've never loved anyone more.
I need to be alone.
I know the timing isn't great
But these things, you just can't plan.
I just need a little time
So I can find myself again
'Cause I get buried underneath
All the things they think you are
And I'm too tired to pretend it doesn't hurt
To be left out
I had a pocket full of dreams
But I gave them all to you
Now I think I want them back
So can you tell me if I'm crazy or confused?
Don't ever change
The way you are
I've never loved anyone more.
piektdiena, 2010. gada 8. oktobris
WHAT THE FUCK.
"Madara Calling.."
Pāvels paceļ.
Ē.. jā?
Hallo, Pāvels?
Jā..?
Te Kaspars, Madaras kursa biedrs, ko dari šodien?
Wha..?
Nu ko dari šodien, negribi līdz nacionālajam teātrim atbraukt ?
Koooaa? Wtf, kas man zvana?
Nu kursa biedrs, negribi atbraukt? Madara baigi tevi grib satikt. Davaj atbrauc.
Nu nezinu, nezinu.
Nu beidz davaj, brauc.
Paklau, man tagad bik ir šoka moments, un man draugs tulīt iebrauks, so nezinu nezinu.
Da bēēidz, davaj kr4, 10 min laikā atsūti sms vai būsi vai nē.
Nu ja, pieņemsim.
Ok, Madara, exbumbul, ja tu šito lasi, tad What The Fuck.
Nē nopietni, kas ar tevīm notiek pēdējā pus gada laikā, man likās mēs visu atrisinājām :/
Ja gribi kko noskaidrot or whatever, tad zvani pati lūdzu and runā.
Pāvels paceļ.
Ē.. jā?
Hallo, Pāvels?
Jā..?
Te Kaspars, Madaras kursa biedrs, ko dari šodien?
Wha..?
Nu ko dari šodien, negribi līdz nacionālajam teātrim atbraukt ?
Koooaa? Wtf, kas man zvana?
Nu kursa biedrs, negribi atbraukt? Madara baigi tevi grib satikt. Davaj atbrauc.
Nu nezinu, nezinu.
Nu beidz davaj, brauc.
Paklau, man tagad bik ir šoka moments, un man draugs tulīt iebrauks, so nezinu nezinu.
Da bēēidz, davaj kr4, 10 min laikā atsūti sms vai būsi vai nē.
Nu ja, pieņemsim.
Ok, Madara, exbumbul, ja tu šito lasi, tad What The Fuck.
Nē nopietni, kas ar tevīm notiek pēdējā pus gada laikā, man likās mēs visu atrisinājām :/
Ja gribi kko noskaidrot or whatever, tad zvani pati lūdzu and runā.
ceturtdiena, 2010. gada 7. oktobris
"I just stop being sad, and be awesome instead." + other stuff.
I want you to realize my feelings,
That's why I always gaze at you with the message
"I love you"
When I met you, then I could finally understand.
That I'm really clumsy when it comes to love.-
-
and be
It's peanut-butter jelly time,
It's peanut-butter jelly time,
Where he at,
Where he at,
Yea, there he go,
There he go.
Peanut-butter jelly,
Peanut-butter jelly,
Yea it's peanut-butter jelly,
Peanut-butter jelly,
Peanut-butter jelly with a baseball bat.
Mmm.. tā sajūta, kad tu apjēdz kaut ko ļoti svarīgu.. kaut ko kas atrisina visas pagātnes mīklas.. un tava atbilde ir tikko izgājusi ārā pa tavām durvīm, jo tu viņu tikko tur izsūtīji, tu to beidzot apjēdz un ar asarām acīs skrien ārā, izskrien uz ielas, paskaties uz abām pusēm, un tur nekā vairs nav, un viss ko tu vai darīt ir izbrēkt ārā tā radījuma vārdu.
Tipiskā saruna, kad prāts un sirds nesadzīvo.
"I hate you because you're an idiot."
"This again..?"
"I hate myself because I'm an idiot too."
Vakar būtu ideāla diena, best of my life, ja vien es nebūtu no rīta redzējis to nobraukto cilvēku, ūn ja man būtu noticis vēl viens miracle, bet nu 2 miracles in 1 morning is fucking amazing, jo tie no manīm pēdējos pāris gadus bija izvairījušies (:
That's why I always gaze at you with the message
"I love you"
When I met you, then I could finally understand.
That I'm really clumsy when it comes to love.-
-
and be
It's peanut-butter jelly time,
It's peanut-butter jelly time,
Where he at,
Where he at,
Yea, there he go,
There he go.
Peanut-butter jelly,
Peanut-butter jelly,
Yea it's peanut-butter jelly,
Peanut-butter jelly,
Peanut-butter jelly with a baseball bat.
Mmm.. tā sajūta, kad tu apjēdz kaut ko ļoti svarīgu.. kaut ko kas atrisina visas pagātnes mīklas.. un tava atbilde ir tikko izgājusi ārā pa tavām durvīm, jo tu viņu tikko tur izsūtīji, tu to beidzot apjēdz un ar asarām acīs skrien ārā, izskrien uz ielas, paskaties uz abām pusēm, un tur nekā vairs nav, un viss ko tu vai darīt ir izbrēkt ārā tā radījuma vārdu.
Tipiskā saruna, kad prāts un sirds nesadzīvo.
"I hate you because you're an idiot."
"This again..?"
"I hate myself because I'm an idiot too."
Vakar būtu ideāla diena, best of my life, ja vien es nebūtu no rīta redzējis to nobraukto cilvēku, ūn ja man būtu noticis vēl viens miracle, bet nu 2 miracles in 1 morning is fucking amazing, jo tie no manīm pēdējos pāris gadus bija izvairījušies (:
pirmdiena, 2010. gada 4. oktobris
I can't quite catch the shape of my dreams, and I don't really want to.
Šodien tiku oficiāli nosaukts par ņauku, jo tomēr neļāvu mani aizvilkt uz politiku, jā aiztiec manu kāju vēl. :D
Yay. Šodien bija smieklīga diena.. Beidzot piespiedu sevi aiziet uz Volvo halli.. lekciju laikā pietamvēl.
Man pietrūka tā aukstā gaisa, ap hokeja laukumu.. Būs jāaizmauc kkad drīz uz kādu spēli, jāpaskatās kā sīkie trako uz ledus.. :D Moš ar Sandru, kā nekā solīju jau gandrīz gadu atpakaļ.
Meitene, kas izraksta abonimentus(or was it abonementus?) uzvedās dīvaini. Pirmo reizi dzīvē viņu redzēju, laikam jauniņā, bēt smaidīja tā dīvaini, it kā pazītu mani, ūn kad atbildēju kā mani sauc tad sāka ķiķināt, pierakstot. Nevar būt, ka pazīstu bet neatceros.. Anyway, būs kkad citreiz jāuzjautā wtf was that about, bet nu whatever for now.
Gribās atrast kanji vārdam "Ryouji", love the way it sounds.
...
...
...
Found it! "亮治".
Funny, kā var tādus simbolus izdomāt vispār.
Every time I laugh, It hurts a little.
Yay. Šodien bija smieklīga diena.. Beidzot piespiedu sevi aiziet uz Volvo halli.. lekciju laikā pietamvēl.
Man pietrūka tā aukstā gaisa, ap hokeja laukumu.. Būs jāaizmauc kkad drīz uz kādu spēli, jāpaskatās kā sīkie trako uz ledus.. :D Moš ar Sandru, kā nekā solīju jau gandrīz gadu atpakaļ.
Meitene, kas izraksta abonimentus(or was it abonementus?) uzvedās dīvaini. Pirmo reizi dzīvē viņu redzēju, laikam jauniņā, bēt smaidīja tā dīvaini, it kā pazītu mani, ūn kad atbildēju kā mani sauc tad sāka ķiķināt, pierakstot. Nevar būt, ka pazīstu bet neatceros.. Anyway, būs kkad citreiz jāuzjautā wtf was that about, bet nu whatever for now.
Gribās atrast kanji vārdam "Ryouji", love the way it sounds.
...
...
...
Found it! "亮治".
Funny, kā var tādus simbolus izdomāt vispār.
Every time I laugh, It hurts a little.
Random notees.. in my head. :]
They seem so close. (:
Man patīk kā izskatās, kad neesmu noskuvies. :D
Angels and Airwaves - The Gift skan galvā visu laiku.
Ja rādās baiss sapnis, tad pamosties var aizverot acis. :)
Jāliek alusledusskapis pie sienas.
Interesanti kur rīt ēdīsim, pie skolas vai pie Nadjas.
Man telefonam ir atslēgti izejošie, yaay. :x
Man negaršo "snickers" bēt kad man šodien viņu iedeva pa brīvu and es apēdu, man garšoja. weird.
Sometimes I sit and wonder, if you were it, or just a prequel.
Do you believe in "ghosts" ?
Man patīk kā izskatās, kad neesmu noskuvies. :D
Angels and Airwaves - The Gift skan galvā visu laiku.
Ja rādās baiss sapnis, tad pamosties var aizverot acis. :)
Jāliek alusledusskapis pie sienas.
Interesanti kur rīt ēdīsim, pie skolas vai pie Nadjas.
Man telefonam ir atslēgti izejošie, yaay. :x
Man negaršo "snickers" bēt kad man šodien viņu iedeva pa brīvu and es apēdu, man garšoja. weird.
Sometimes I sit and wonder, if you were it, or just a prequel.
Do you believe in "ghosts" ?
svētdiena, 2010. gada 3. oktobris
Why don't I?
Because I have nothing to say.
Stop pretending that it's not the ending
And let the end begin.
Uz laimīgākas nots - "Toradora!" ir vnk looooooooooooool.
Stop pretending that it's not the ending
And let the end begin.
Uz laimīgākas nots - "Toradora!" ir vnk looooooooooooool.
trešdiena, 2010. gada 29. septembris
khm. :)
Dīvaini jūtos kkā šodien
Varbūt arī vakar, nezinu, esmu nedaudz zaudējis laika izjūtu.
Esmu nedaudz pazaudējis sevi, ūn jūtos dīvaini, bet man ir smaids sejā, tik pat kā visu laiku, can you believe it.
And ievēroju dīvainību, ka man pēdejās 3 naktis rādījās sapņi, visi par vienu tēmu, bet ar dažādiem cilvēkiem tajos.
Pa dienām arī notiek dīvainības.. Vakar man bija totāls "Zane, what the fuck." moments, jo cilvēks izdarīja kaut ko tādu ko es nu tõõõtāli negaidīju, bet nu labi, lai tak papriecājas, kamēr var.
Nu ja.. rīt jāsakūda dažus labus uz dzeršanu, man to nedaudz tagad gribās, un no tiem 11Litriem alus tak kkā ir jātiek vaļā.. Viss labi laikam kopumā, dīvaini tik naktīs, mēģinot aizmigt kaut kā.. Miegs nenāk un arī domāt nav ko. Vajag atrast sevi.
Skan : Matt Nathanson - I Saw(Acoustic)
Varbūt arī vakar, nezinu, esmu nedaudz zaudējis laika izjūtu.
Esmu nedaudz pazaudējis sevi, ūn jūtos dīvaini, bet man ir smaids sejā, tik pat kā visu laiku, can you believe it.
And ievēroju dīvainību, ka man pēdejās 3 naktis rādījās sapņi, visi par vienu tēmu, bet ar dažādiem cilvēkiem tajos.
Pa dienām arī notiek dīvainības.. Vakar man bija totāls "Zane, what the fuck." moments, jo cilvēks izdarīja kaut ko tādu ko es nu tõõõtāli negaidīju, bet nu labi, lai tak papriecājas, kamēr var.
Nu ja.. rīt jāsakūda dažus labus uz dzeršanu, man to nedaudz tagad gribās, un no tiem 11Litriem alus tak kkā ir jātiek vaļā.. Viss labi laikam kopumā, dīvaini tik naktīs, mēģinot aizmigt kaut kā.. Miegs nenāk un arī domāt nav ko. Vajag atrast sevi.
Skan : Matt Nathanson - I Saw(Acoustic)
pirmdiena, 2010. gada 27. septembris
Muļķi.
Mēs visi dzīvojam ilūziju pasaulē.
Paši veidojam savas ilūzijas un izvēlamies cik ilgi tām ticēt..
Tik daudzas ikdienišķas sajūtas ir ilūzijas..
Naivums ir tikai pārlieka uzticēšanās tām ilūzijām..
Par to vakaru pieturā, pirmajā reizē, es šodien padomāju. daudz. centos atcerēties, kāpēc tad īsti es nedarīju tās "hug all the time" and stuff lietas. Atcerējos. Because I had other things on my mind[about you though.]. + bija excitement un samulsums. And nu jā.. funny apzināties, ka tavs liktenis ir nolemts jau pirms satikšanās. "Tu domā ka es nezināju ka tu neko neizdarīsi!? Man tas dzīvē jau ir bijis." nesaprotu, kā pilnīgi citu cilvēku var uzreiz pielīdzināt citam tik vienkārši, it īpaši ja tas cilveks nav agrāk dzīvē satikts. but oh well. I guess I have a good pokerface and otherpokerstuff, jo pretty much all of my friends would say the complete opposite of me, not "viņš nekad neko neizdara" and stuff. but what do they know.
Feel free to correct or not give a damn.
Anyway.. I promise I won't have any ridiculous little hopes or anything in me anymore. I won't.
Here's the song I said I'd add, that was playing on my phone.
And yeah.. It's been here before. Now it has a meaning.
What do you do when your world finally crashes and burns, and you know that this is.. this is the un-dis-pu-ted end.?
We'll see what's out there.
P.S. Tagad es sapratu to, ko nekad nevareju saprast. Kāpēc filmās galvenie varoņi dažreiz pieļauj attiecību beigas, pat ja viņiem ir zināms kaut kas, kas visu var glābt, bet viņi to nedara/nesaka, jo redz cik laimīgs ir tas otrs cilvēks.. Es gan nesaku, ka man tāda lieta ir zināma.
Paši veidojam savas ilūzijas un izvēlamies cik ilgi tām ticēt..
Tik daudzas ikdienišķas sajūtas ir ilūzijas..
Naivums ir tikai pārlieka uzticēšanās tām ilūzijām..
Par to vakaru pieturā, pirmajā reizē, es šodien padomāju. daudz. centos atcerēties, kāpēc tad īsti es nedarīju tās "hug all the time" and stuff lietas. Atcerējos. Because I had other things on my mind[about you though.]. + bija excitement un samulsums. And nu jā.. funny apzināties, ka tavs liktenis ir nolemts jau pirms satikšanās. "Tu domā ka es nezināju ka tu neko neizdarīsi!? Man tas dzīvē jau ir bijis." nesaprotu, kā pilnīgi citu cilvēku var uzreiz pielīdzināt citam tik vienkārši, it īpaši ja tas cilveks nav agrāk dzīvē satikts. but oh well. I guess I have a good pokerface and otherpokerstuff, jo pretty much all of my friends would say the complete opposite of me, not "viņš nekad neko neizdara" and stuff. but what do they know.
Feel free to correct or not give a damn.
Anyway.. I promise I won't have any ridiculous little hopes or anything in me anymore. I won't.
Here's the song I said I'd add, that was playing on my phone.
And yeah.. It's been here before. Now it has a meaning.
What do you do when your world finally crashes and burns, and you know that this is.. this is the un-dis-pu-ted end.?
We'll see what's out there.
P.S. Tagad es sapratu to, ko nekad nevareju saprast. Kāpēc filmās galvenie varoņi dažreiz pieļauj attiecību beigas, pat ja viņiem ir zināms kaut kas, kas visu var glābt, bet viņi to nedara/nesaka, jo redz cik laimīgs ir tas otrs cilvēks.. Es gan nesaku, ka man tāda lieta ir zināma.
Par vakarnakti.
Komentāru šobrīd nav.. EXCEPT - dažreiz es vnk mīlu savu telefonu, piemēram šodien no rīta. vnk lol, pirmā dziesma kas sāka skanēt, un es nezinu kāpēc tā vairāk ieklausījos vārdos, un pēc apm 20 sek liku dziesmu no sākuma, lai ieklausīties vēl labāk, ūn omg. so funny. PIRMĀ DZIESMA kas skanēja ir vnk 100000% what I'm thinking right now, everything to the smallest word in the song. Jau ielikta melnrakstos, lai neaizmirst, ūn 95% ka tiks te ievietota pēc neilga laiciņa.
P.S. ZOMG IZSKATĀS KA VIŅAS SPĪD! <3
P.S. ZOMG IZSKATĀS KA VIŅAS SPĪD! <3
svētdiena, 2010. gada 26. septembris
The Long One.
Vai tu riskētu nodarīt pavisam nedaudz pari sev ļoti svarīgam cilvēkam, lai pašam sāpētu sākumā, bet pēc laika, lai tu justos labāk kā jebkad? Vai tu to izdarītu? Vai tu ieliktu savas cerības, sapņus un vilšanās kastē un sadedzinātu visu, lai atbrīvotu vietu kaut kam jaunam? Es to nespēju izdarīt nu jau pāris gadus. Negribu... Es negribu savā dzīvē vairs neko zaudēt. Es negribu vairs pat ne vismazākās sirdssāpes. Es negribu. Kā saka, cilvēki var turēt citus sev uz āķa, kā HIMYM'ā teica "On the hook" un to visu var tik viegli bet grūti izbeigt. Bet vai vajag? Really? Ko tu īsti ar to panāc, izņemot to, ka tagad tu točna zini ka viss nekad nebūs tā kā tu to gribi. Kāpēc ir vajadzīga tāda apziņa? Es labāk dzīvoju ar cerību un sapņiem, pat ja sapņi man naktīs nerādās, bet tas tik tādēļ ka pa dienu man galvai cauri iziet TIK daudz domu, ka sapņiem neatliek spēka. At least that's what I tell myself. Es labāk dzīvoju ar apziņu, ka es izdarīju vairāk kā cits izdarītu manā vietā, un ka I gave it a shot, and even though the target gave me my bullet back, I still have it and hope that I'll use it again, yet am pretty sure that I won't be shooting it if I'll get the chance, cause you know.. take too many shots at happiness and you might just kill it.And even though I'll never get the chance, Es ceru, jo man to vajag, tā pat kā man vajag elpot. Tādējādi manī ir caurums, bet I still feel complete. 2:49.. Laikam jāmēģina aizmigt un jāliek telefons malā.. Save.
...
...
30 mins later.
Laikam gulēt neizdosies. Domu vilciens turpinās.
Izmantošu zemeni, jo man garšo zemenes.
Tu esi tu. Viņa ir zemene.
Tu es vienkārši tu, katru reizi kad viņa tuvojas tev, vai tu tuvojies viņai, tev rodas ne tikai siena priekšā, bet arī viss vairogs un akmens apvalks ap tevi, diezvai tas kādreiz mainīsies, lai arī kāds ierocis kādam no jums būtu. Kad tev pienāk klāt ķirses un citi garšīgi radījumi, you have no problems whatsoever. Bet nu ko darīsi, ja tev vislabāk garšo tā zemene. Dīvaini, jo zemenes mēdz būt arī ūdeņainas un ļoti negaršīgas, bet tu esi pārliecināts ka tev tā zemene garšo, pat ja tu nezini kāda viņa ir. Vēl interesants fakts ir, ka tai zemenei ir amnēzija, un viņa nezin kas un kāds tu esi. And she has a blindspot, directly where you're standing. Ko darīsi? Tieši tā.
...
...
30 mins later.
Laikam gulēt neizdosies. Domu vilciens turpinās.
Izmantošu zemeni, jo man garšo zemenes.
Tu esi tu. Viņa ir zemene.
Tu es vienkārši tu, katru reizi kad viņa tuvojas tev, vai tu tuvojies viņai, tev rodas ne tikai siena priekšā, bet arī viss vairogs un akmens apvalks ap tevi, diezvai tas kādreiz mainīsies, lai arī kāds ierocis kādam no jums būtu. Kad tev pienāk klāt ķirses un citi garšīgi radījumi, you have no problems whatsoever. Bet nu ko darīsi, ja tev vislabāk garšo tā zemene. Dīvaini, jo zemenes mēdz būt arī ūdeņainas un ļoti negaršīgas, bet tu esi pārliecināts ka tev tā zemene garšo, pat ja tu nezini kāda viņa ir. Vēl interesants fakts ir, ka tai zemenei ir amnēzija, un viņa nezin kas un kāds tu esi. And she has a blindspot, directly where you're standing. Ko darīsi? Tieši tā.
Doing it.
I would do it.
I would.
But, I won't.
Even under these circumstances..
I would..
But I won't.
Maybe for as much as 2 more years.
Maybe as much as 10.
But probably.. ever.
I would.
But, I won't.
Even under these circumstances..
I would..
But I won't.
Maybe for as much as 2 more years.
Maybe as much as 10.
But probably.. ever.
sestdiena, 2010. gada 25. septembris
You and Me. ©Okyo 2k10.
These questions I've wanted to ask,
Never really seemed like a "Have to do" task.
It was basically, just another mask..
But..
Well.. you have yours and I have mine,
I don't feel happy, and you don't seem fine.
How about we end it this time?
Will I be yours and will you be mine?
Just this one time,
Will it work out, or will I be tryin'a
Go on again and try to be fine?
Will I live my life, or will you live mine?
Will we share each other's,
Like as if we only had one piece of pie?
Will I break your heart, or will you break mine..
After it all, which one will end up fine?
Will we break up, or get separated by time?
Will we be forced to divide,
Or float around in our own riptide?
These weird thoughts go through my head..
Every once in a while..
Is it a big joke,
Or will you ride by my side?
Will I be with you,
Or will you just hide.
Will you have the will,
To see what's inside?
And when it all ends,
Where will your grave be, and where will be mine.
Will we be together,
Or from each other - aside.
Asociācijas.
Katrs cilvēks, katru cilvēku ar kaut ko asociē. vai tā ir lieta, vai sajūta, vai stāvoklis.
Vai tev patīk, tas ar ko tevi asociē?
Vai tevi apmierina tas, ar ko tu asociē citus?
Šie divi jautājumi man galvā ir pēdējās pāris minūtes.
Ūn pirmajam jautājumam, mana atbilde bija - "gandrīz vienmēr - nav iebildumu. except one, that IMO doesn't suit me... bet nu, ko darīsi, ja tāds tu kādam liecies, pat ja tas cilvēks tevi pilnībā nepazīst.[hellõ maskas.]"
Otrajam jautājumam atbilde bija "Gandrīz vienmēr - Nē". Dažos gadījumos tā sajūta-asociācija sucks bigtime, bet it's there nonetheless. Ūn vispār - burkāns? kamõn. Even for me that's a bit "pff".
Vai tev patīk, tas ar ko tevi asociē?
Vai tevi apmierina tas, ar ko tu asociē citus?
Šie divi jautājumi man galvā ir pēdējās pāris minūtes.
Ūn pirmajam jautājumam, mana atbilde bija - "gandrīz vienmēr - nav iebildumu. except one, that IMO doesn't suit me... bet nu, ko darīsi, ja tāds tu kādam liecies, pat ja tas cilvēks tevi pilnībā nepazīst.[hellõ maskas.]"
Otrajam jautājumam atbilde bija "Gandrīz vienmēr - Nē". Dažos gadījumos tā sajūta-asociācija sucks bigtime, bet it's there nonetheless. Ūn vispār - burkāns? kamõn. Even for me that's a bit "pff".
piektdiena, 2010. gada 24. septembris
Šitie vārdi man iepatikās.
You have the unexplainable way of breaking my heart and putting it back together in a matter of minutes.
Janvāris again. Oh well, kas to būtu domājis ka šī dziesma man blogā būs divreiz.
They're playing our song
They're playing our song
Can you see the lights?
Can you hear the hum?
Of our song
I hope they get it right
I hope we dance tonight
Before we, get it wrong
And the seasons
Will change us new
Be the best I've known
and you know me
I could not be stuck on you
If it were true
I was sleeping
My eyes were dark
Til you woke me
And told me that opening
is just the start
it was
Now I see you, til kingdom come
You're the one I want
To see me for all the stupid shit I've done
(Chorus)
Soil and six feet under
Killed just like we were
Before you knew you'd know me
And you know me
Blooming up from the ground
3 Rounds and a sound
Like whispering you know me
And you know me
So this was our song
This was our song
I still see the lights
I can see them
And the criss cross
Of what is true, won't get to us
Cause you know me
I could not give up on you
And the fog of what is right
Won't cover us cause you know me
I could not give up a fight
What are you asking me for, It's not my goddamn history.
Labvakar.
Pēc dz.d. esmu nekāds, bet nu tas nekas, vismaz būs 20.gadu jubileja, ko atcerēties (can you smell the irony in this last word?). Vēders joprojām jocīgs. Man ir kaste ar alu. Smagi stiept uz mājām bija. Tālu.
Bija forši, pamodos blakus galdiņam ar netīrām glāzītēm un saplēstiem prezervatīviem [hello jurģa galva]
Bija labi kopumā. Awesome in fact.
Anyway. Nesen uzzināju surprise, ka toms brauks uz Latviju uz 2 dienām ūn man jau teica lai atbrīvoju sev tās 2 dienas pēc mēneša. Fuck yea we're gonna have fun.
Vēl.. nu.. tikko man bija surprise. and nedaudz runa iegāja tēmā par vieglu cilvēku nolasīšanu. kinda. Prātā nāk viens ieraksts pirms pāris nedēļām, maybe pāris mēnešiem, kur teicu par to ka zaudēju iespēju iejusties citu ādā, ko arī izmantoju citu nolasīšanai. agrāk. uz mirklīti vienu brīdi bija atpakaļ man tā spēja and I sure hope I'm wrong.. moving on.
Tagad[like pirms 20 sek] man atnāca funny sms
"čau, te simona, atsūtīsi lūdzu to prezentāciju?"
atbilde : "nepareizs nummurs :)"
"oops..sorry! jauku vakaru! :)"
can someone tell me kāpēc es no tā pasmaidīju..? :D
anyway, awesome. what else..
ā jā.. mīlīši, zinat kāda man sajūta par pēdējām pāris dienām?
abstrakti runājot.. tu esi kūrorta salā, palmas utt, tikai nez kāpēc pie tevis ieradies ledusskapis, atvērās tavā priekšā, tu tur redzi alus pudeli, tu zini to alu, tev viņš garšo, tu nāc tuvāk, ledusskapis tevi ievelk sevī un aizver durvis. Tu sēdi ledusskapī, aukstumā ar alu rokās, atvēri, padzeries, viņš garšo citādāk nekā tu atceries, bet tu nevari saprast, labi vai ne pārak, un tu nevari saprast, vai tev ledusskapī iekšā patīk vai nē.
Tā lūk. weird mind I has, I know.
Evening song -
arlabunakti, you.
Pēc dz.d. esmu nekāds, bet nu tas nekas, vismaz būs 20.gadu jubileja, ko atcerēties (can you smell the irony in this last word?). Vēders joprojām jocīgs. Man ir kaste ar alu. Smagi stiept uz mājām bija. Tālu.
Bija forši, pamodos blakus galdiņam ar netīrām glāzītēm un saplēstiem prezervatīviem [hello jurģa galva]
Bija labi kopumā. Awesome in fact.
Anyway. Nesen uzzināju surprise, ka toms brauks uz Latviju uz 2 dienām ūn man jau teica lai atbrīvoju sev tās 2 dienas pēc mēneša. Fuck yea we're gonna have fun.
Vēl.. nu.. tikko man bija surprise. and nedaudz runa iegāja tēmā par vieglu cilvēku nolasīšanu. kinda. Prātā nāk viens ieraksts pirms pāris nedēļām, maybe pāris mēnešiem, kur teicu par to ka zaudēju iespēju iejusties citu ādā, ko arī izmantoju citu nolasīšanai. agrāk. uz mirklīti vienu brīdi bija atpakaļ man tā spēja and I sure hope I'm wrong.. moving on.
Tagad[like pirms 20 sek] man atnāca funny sms
"čau, te simona, atsūtīsi lūdzu to prezentāciju?"
atbilde : "nepareizs nummurs :)"
"oops..sorry! jauku vakaru! :)"
can someone tell me kāpēc es no tā pasmaidīju..? :D
anyway, awesome. what else..
ā jā.. mīlīši, zinat kāda man sajūta par pēdējām pāris dienām?
abstrakti runājot.. tu esi kūrorta salā, palmas utt, tikai nez kāpēc pie tevis ieradies ledusskapis, atvērās tavā priekšā, tu tur redzi alus pudeli, tu zini to alu, tev viņš garšo, tu nāc tuvāk, ledusskapis tevi ievelk sevī un aizver durvis. Tu sēdi ledusskapī, aukstumā ar alu rokās, atvēri, padzeries, viņš garšo citādāk nekā tu atceries, bet tu nevari saprast, labi vai ne pārak, un tu nevari saprast, vai tev ledusskapī iekšā patīk vai nē.
Tā lūk. weird mind I has, I know.
Evening song -
arlabunakti, you.
otrdiena, 2010. gada 21. septembris
pirmdiena, 2010. gada 20. septembris
Phone talk with the UK.
Nu jā.. tie bij labie laiki.
Kā Laurai iet?
Kā lai es to zinu.
Nu kā, jūs taču visu laiku tur pa skype runājat.
Es ar Lauru savā dzīvē esmu skypā runājis kādas 4 reizes, bet nu jā, incanti gan kā viņai tur spānijā iet.
Nu jā jā jā, neaizmirsti ka es ar viņu uz angļu valodu gāju, viņa man daudz ko stāstīja.
Tajau laikam tu zini vairāk par mani.
Laikam gan.
Laikam vairāk par Lauru arī.
Pašol!
Today's song:
Kā Laurai iet?
Kā lai es to zinu.
Nu kā, jūs taču visu laiku tur pa skype runājat.
Es ar Lauru savā dzīvē esmu skypā runājis kādas 4 reizes, bet nu jā, incanti gan kā viņai tur spānijā iet.
Nu jā jā jā, neaizmirsti ka es ar viņu uz angļu valodu gāju, viņa man daudz ko stāstīja.
Tajau laikam tu zini vairāk par mani.
Laikam gan.
Laikam vairāk par Lauru arī.
Pašol!
Today's song:
Sigulda
Mana dz.d. tuvojas..
Vakardien nosvinēta cita cilvēka dz.d., nujau, šodien - vēl vienam būs, ūn rīt man. can't wait can't wait.
Anyway.. vakar tika nedaudz iedzerts ģimenes lokā, ūn LOL bet es 21:30 devos uz migu.
nu jām.. palasījos savās vecās īsziņās ūn funny.. Uzspiežot uz "saved messages" izlec lodziņš "empty".
Kas to būtu domājis..ūn jā.. palīdu cauri sam 574 message inboxam.. palasījos, atcerējos. fun times.
Ierakstīju draftos "I miss those messages." ūn tad.. mēģināju aizmigt. 3 stundas mēģināju. not working.
pārvācos uz citu guļvietu ūn tur arī stundu mocījos.. aizmigu.. lucky me... pēc 30 min es saņēmu īsziņu ar vārdiem "Kā iet?" ūn es oficiāli pirmo reizi dzīvē biju dusmīgs uz sms nakts vidū, spešalī, jo tas cilvēks nu vnk nesaprot ka mani ir jāliek mierā.(paralēles for the win.) Tā man laikam vajag par to, ka I miss those messages. Saņēmu pa nopelniem.
... pēc vēl 2h atkal aizmigu. visu dienu biju nekāds.
And.. I freaking love this dog, kuram tagad nez kāpēc sākusi niezēt aste <3
Vakardien nosvinēta cita cilvēka dz.d., nujau, šodien - vēl vienam būs, ūn rīt man. can't wait can't wait.
Anyway.. vakar tika nedaudz iedzerts ģimenes lokā, ūn LOL bet es 21:30 devos uz migu.
nu jām.. palasījos savās vecās īsziņās ūn funny.. Uzspiežot uz "saved messages" izlec lodziņš "empty".
Kas to būtu domājis..ūn jā.. palīdu cauri sam 574 message inboxam.. palasījos, atcerējos. fun times.
Ierakstīju draftos "I miss those messages." ūn tad.. mēģināju aizmigt. 3 stundas mēģināju. not working.
pārvācos uz citu guļvietu ūn tur arī stundu mocījos.. aizmigu.. lucky me... pēc 30 min es saņēmu īsziņu ar vārdiem "Kā iet?" ūn es oficiāli pirmo reizi dzīvē biju dusmīgs uz sms nakts vidū, spešalī, jo tas cilvēks nu vnk nesaprot ka mani ir jāliek mierā.(paralēles for the win.) Tā man laikam vajag par to, ka I miss those messages. Saņēmu pa nopelniem.
... pēc vēl 2h atkal aizmigu. visu dienu biju nekāds.
And.. I freaking love this dog, kuram tagad nez kāpēc sākusi niezēt aste <3
piektdiena, 2010. gada 17. septembris
Another one.
Override my fears and stop dragging around the unfulfilled dreams of yesterday.
Some nights I lie awake, wondering whatever happened.
I have a picture, pinned to my wall
A picture of you and of me,
And we were laughing with love in it all.
You know that I do and that this is just one of those games that we play.
And I ask your forgiveness,
Though I don't know just what I'm asking it for.
Šodienas saulīšmoments.
# Nu jā.. pievienosies mums?
% Jā labprāt.
# Bet būs ilgi.
% Jā labprāt.
# Visu nakti
% Jā labprāt.
# (sunnnnnnnn)
Some nights I lie awake, wondering whatever happened.
I have a picture, pinned to my wall
A picture of you and of me,
And we were laughing with love in it all.
You know that I do and that this is just one of those games that we play.
And I ask your forgiveness,
Though I don't know just what I'm asking it for.
Šodienas saulīšmoments.
# Nu jā.. pievienosies mums?
% Jā labprāt.
# Bet būs ilgi.
% Jā labprāt.
# Visu nakti
% Jā labprāt.
# (sunnnnnnnn)
ceturtdiena, 2010. gada 16. septembris
domiņ....a #2
Dažreiz tev liekas, ka kaut kas ir ideāls.
Dažreiz tu gaidi, lai tas beidzot ir tavs.
Dažreiz tikai viens neliels, tāds kā mājieniņš, ka vari iet un ņemt, ir viss kas tev vajadzīgs.
Dažreiz, tas brīdis nekad nepienāk.
Un tad tas var tikt saukts par "The waste"
A dažreiz pienāk, bet tu esi pārāk akls, lai to pamanīt.
Un tad tas var tikt saukts par "The one that got away"
A dažreiz pienāk, un tu pamani un viss ir õsom.
Un tad tas var tikt saukts par "Happy beginning."
Did I waste my psycho-ism on one summer.?
The answer's simple but hard -
Sukidesu.
By the way.
Mān pirms pailga laiciņa tika atsūtīta dziesma Motion City Soundtrack - Her Words Destroyed My Planet,
Ūn man pašam smiekli nāk katru reizi kā to dziesmu dzirdu, jo es totāli daru visu kas tajā dziesmā, izņemot
The job is not at the uncommon grounds,
I never had an Xbox,
The course is not online.
The building has not been torn down.
gg.
Dažreiz tu gaidi, lai tas beidzot ir tavs.
Dažreiz tikai viens neliels, tāds kā mājieniņš, ka vari iet un ņemt, ir viss kas tev vajadzīgs.
Dažreiz, tas brīdis nekad nepienāk.
Un tad tas var tikt saukts par "The waste"
A dažreiz pienāk, bet tu esi pārāk akls, lai to pamanīt.
Un tad tas var tikt saukts par "The one that got away"
A dažreiz pienāk, un tu pamani un viss ir õsom.
Un tad tas var tikt saukts par "Happy beginning."
Did I waste my psycho-ism on one summer.?
The answer's simple but hard -
Sukidesu.
By the way.
Mān pirms pailga laiciņa tika atsūtīta dziesma Motion City Soundtrack - Her Words Destroyed My Planet,
Ūn man pašam smiekli nāk katru reizi kā to dziesmu dzirdu, jo es totāli daru visu kas tajā dziesmā, izņemot
The job is not at the uncommon grounds,
I never had an Xbox,
The course is not online.
The building has not been torn down.
gg.
Back to my oldies.
For a minute, she's stuck spinning in it
Still it's better to lose hope than dying in it
Off track, impact, slam!
She's lying in it
Now she leads the way to the lost cost exhibit
You got to break through the walls that try to hold you
Fool you so that fear will always mold you
Push through
Find that the walls are beneath you
And the end of the line is a brand new avenue
You said nothing in this world could ever
Make you feel better than I do
You said no one in this world could ever
Take away all this from you
So hold on just a little longer
When you don't feel that you belong
All I want is a chance to fall into you
What a sin it's to find fulfillment
If it's better to crash land than flying in it
Violins, silence, anger violence
Says to herself "I'm going out of my mind"
Break yourself from old ties that hold you down
You inspire me, You inspire me
I don't mind wasting time with you
Give up, give up, give up
The dream is over
We lost the buzz
And now we're running sober
It's like holding onto pieces when the puzzle doesn't fit
It's like the feeling that you get right before you hit
It's like the ground opened up and swallowed you where you sit
It's like you'd kill for what you had 'cause now you got shit
It's like you can't always get what you want.
sestdiena, 2010. gada 11. septembris
Awesome lyrics.
You sit beside me
And I love you
But I hate you
I don't want to feel this way
But I can't stop
You reach for my hand
But I move it
Before you can
I won't let you have the power once again
So help me, God
To let this go
To let this go
So help me, God
(Become what I believe)
To break this hold
(I'm afraid to leave)
To find myself
(I just need to breathe)
You think you know me
But you changed me
Into somebody
That I don't ever want to be again
I'm letting go now
Of this burden
I've been holding
I've been hurting myself now for way too long
So help me, God
To let this go
To let this go
So help me, God
(Become what I believe)
To break this hold
(I'm afraid to leave)
To find myself
(I just need to breathe)
It's not too late
It's not too late
To leave it all behind
It's not too late
It's not too late
So help me, God
To let this go
To let this go
So help me, God
(Become what I believe)
To break this hold
(I'm afraid to leave)
To find myself
(I just need to breathe)
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